I met my husband online back in 2012.
Hold up – don’t leave just yet. A lot has changed with online dating since then – I am well aware – but not everything.
Do you know how long it took me before I found my Mr. Right? Do you know how many dates I went on and had to turn down? Do you even know how many times I dealt with the very same stressful, chaotic and impatient temptations that would eventually leave me at a dark dead-end (like in many failing dating stories and relationships)?
Over 4 long years, 1 very reluctant woman, a few weirdos, A-holes and learned life lessons later – there stumbled in the guy she literally never saw coming, and who is now her husband.
Was online dating a breeze? Far from it.
Would I say it was worth it? Absolutely.
The last thing I want to do is scare people off by speaking my mind. But some of the sh*t I dish is part in the reality many aren’t willing to acknowledge or accept. When that first part is true – online dating wasn’t easy. It was hectic, a rush of whirlwind emotions with highs and lows, and at times ultimate highs and ultimate lows. It was disappointing, yet encouraging as I also witnessed personal growth.
Online dating taught me a lot about myself – self awareness, self worth, and reinforced standards and expectations I didn’t know I had. So I decided – why not share my success story? My side is rather unique – my tactics were different, against the norm and rather obsolete in today’s dating realm. Over the years from my blog I created many posts pertaining to my personal online dating success to shed light on the struggles of online dating, gives those an alternative to finding their personal success, and give real advice unlike the sugar-coated BS out there.
I met my husband through online dating – you can find Love, too
So you’re probably wondering, “Well, then what’s your secret? “
There really is no secret. Yes, I know this entire post sounds practically misleading and useless, but it got you to this point, where I am about to tell you that there is no secret because it’s simply a mastered mindset. The crazy thing is that the better chance of success is right there in front of you – yet many are so blinded by their own repeatedly failing ways, and refuse to actually listen. Like, to yourself.
Are you ready to listen?
First, define what online dating “success” means to you. Obviously, for me, I met my [now] husband. So finding my lifelong partner and companion was my end-goal. You might simply want a date that is actually fulfilling (even if it leads nowhere), or that steady commitment with someone but with no-future-strings-attached. Whatever that success goal is – make it clear and known.
Secondly, after exploring forums and groups online, I never actually realize how many struggle with online dating. And the thing is – some are just not cut out for it. I’m also not ruling out the possibility that the general dating app Pop is somewhat of a tainted, or rigged cesspool – whatever you want to call it. So when you choose to date online, you really need to assign yourself the role as your mentor. Because whether you believe it or not, your instinct (internal mentor) is usually right…you just usually choose to ignore it. You need to accept this part of the process to learn more about yourself and get comfortable tuning INWARD for answers.
And, like I also said, it takes TIME. *Remember, I spent 4 years dating online. But my dating app ReSuMe was NOT my sole identity, nor was it treated as my life line to finding and being open to Love. In that meantime, I had my own work to do – the inner work.
So that being said, here is a compilation of personal tips, experience and success. I highly encourage you to take notes, to read each post considerably and with an open mind, as well as to avoid overloading yourself with its content in a short span.*Reminder, my success does not GUARANTEE your success, but knowledge, receptivity and enlightenment is POWER.
[What every SUCCESSFUL online dating profile has (As of 2020)]
[11 Reasons why online dating is difficult today]
[Online dating during a pandemic (3 Lockdown dangers to be AWARE of)]
[My key personal success advice on the online dating sh*tshow]
[How I upheld traditional values in a modern dating world]
[How to find Love in HOOKUP culture *not for the faint-hearted*]
[When he ‘Ghosts’ you (What it means + what you can do)]
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Disclaimer: Series is solely based on my personal experience. Results may vary for every individual.