Let me make one thing perfectly clear before you read on: disappointment in relationships is inevitable, so we must learn to brace for impact. Because, inevitably, we’re all bound to make mistakes. But there is a clear difference between a mistake, and an excuse in terms of negative behavior in dating, relationships and even marriage.
So who am I even talking about? The guy who always leaves you hanging – him, the one who can never live it down another day without making you feel unimportant, or leaving you to question his intentions, feelings, motives or love for you. I will tell you this: he knows what he’s doing. Here’s why he’s doing it, and 5 reasons to call it quits.
If he always leaves you disappointed, it’s time to call it quits
He doesn’t plan on changing his ways for good
It isn’t rocket science, ladies. If you’re dating the guy who constantly leaves you hanging in the dust, or reaps the benefits of your frustration, pain, heartache, and disappointments (because, well, he hasn’t actually made any attempt not to) – that behavior probably isn’t ever going to do a 180.
And to be frank, it has to be change coming from him, not being begged of by you.
He honestly doesn’t care
And since he probably isn’t planning on changing his ways, that’s the obvious sign that he just doesn’t care. Harsh reality – I know it – but if you’re going to stick around waiting for change (all the while dodging, or worse, anticipating disappointment), he’s likely going to think his behavior is totally acceptable since you’re tolerating it.
Real men make mistakes, learn from them, and do their Honest-To-God best to avoid them again (which means taking accountability for his behavior).
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He just can’t measure up
Let’s be real – some of us can be pretty demanding creatures. Wait, stop, don’t leave just yet. Just take a moment to turn inward, self-reflect.
If you’re genuinely disappointed that he didn’t bring you Lilies over Roses – such reoccurring situations might not really be his problem. And the fact may be that the red flags aren’t coming from his direction. Nonetheless, we’re all guilty of being petty, or having high demands in what we expect from relationships, but this behavior can be misleading and oftentimes intimidating for guys who are truly and honestly aiming to please.
In this case, he truly may not be able to measure up, whether that be financially, emotionally, or physically. It’s not necessarily his fault that for every reach you raise the bar higher.
He isn’t ready himself
If he ain’t there, he ain’t there, you know? You can’t make him do or be anything. He may know just what to say or how to make things seem “right” in the moment (for just a moment) but in the end, you always end up back at square one. He may truly care about you – sure, that’s the silver lining – he just can’t commit, which means you can’t love him harder into changing or staying.
It’s your clear sign he isn’t for you
Disappointment = unfulfillment.
And in dating, that surface-level fulfillment is usually the automatic focal point. When you’re really “in Love“, or you’re really into each other – tuning into and meeting each other’s seems easy, effortless, even. But if you’re with someone who refuses to fulfill your needs, couldn’t care less about them, or simply can’t – that is a clear enough sign that he just isn’t in the cards for you.
In hindsight, there are plenty of fish in the sea who are willing and able to do so!