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4 Reasons why your hair won’t stay straight or curl

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theMRSingLink

There’s only one reason why hair can be the ultimate struggle – we want what we don’t have! It’s not that we can’t have it, we just dread the endless time of trial and error, money, effort, and patience that goes along with it. And in the end, it may never look how we envisioned.

Girly, if this is you, then you likely experience the never-ending battle of why your hair won’t stay straight or curl.

As a 3ABC and even 4A “fine” Hair Type, I am also blessed to be able to trick my hair into looking sleek straight. Though not without time, skill and effort. Refer to the graphic of different hair types and be able to pinpoint yours. *I created this graphic, and while it’s not perfect, extend me some grace.

It’s important to note that my ability to go sleek straight as a curly girly is entirely temporary, especially the moment my hair comes into contact with high humidity, steam, rain, mist, dampness, downpour or from plunging into a swimming pool. It is what it is, that temporary sleek look will revert to its default state when conditions are not favorable.

But that’s not why you’re here! You want to know why your hair won’t straighten, stay straight (or curl), no matter how hard you try!

Women with curly hair spend boo-koo bucks on Keratin treatments to get immaculate straight hair, and those with straight hair get perms, or something else of the sort nowadays.

Either way, we fry the life out of our hair to achieve a desired look. And if not, the heatless curl styling simply doesn’t work for everyone – not even me if I’m trying to achieve a smoother, looser curl look. Nope, I end up looking like Shirley Temple.

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Here’s what you may not know. The hair follicle is a muscle, and the hair itself – I am convinced – is able to be “trained”. I can easily train my part to either side or down the middle, whenever I feel like it- this just takes some time.

So with that, I am also convinced it is possible to train the hair to curl or straighten, depending on your hair’s natural state. Again, it’s not permanent, by any means, and definitely won’t be perfect but can still be achieved to a degree. It’s short-lived #hairgoals until you wash it out again.

Ultimately, I’m sharing my take as a curly girly who can also achieve a sleek straight look, and what I’ve learned over the years (as well as having once worked at a hair salon).

4 Reasons why your hair won’t stay straight or curl

4 REAL Reasons Why Your Hair Won't Hold a Curl or Stay Sleek Straight | The correct methods and products to use for your hair type | #hairhacks theMRSingLink

You’re focused too much on perfection

Listen, it took me YEARS to:

A. Figure out how to keep my hair straight (without fail of the inevitable Florida fate of 90-100% humidity year-round),

B. Tame the frizz, or keep it from going flat, losing its shape, getting weighed down too quickly or *poof* frizzy.

C. Give it body and shine that won’t end with needing a washout 8 hours later from oil build-up (because of, alas, most curly-haired-girls world problems), and

D. Realize the vital lifeline and importance of pre-styling scalp cleansing and heat protectant.

And in the end, when I straighten my hair, it rarely (if only for a moment, until I put down my flat iron) looks like the image on the left but more realistically like the image on the right after about an hour, give or take.

To me, as a curly girl with 3-4 type hair, that’s straight! And while I know wavy girls are chomping at the bit to call me out, you have to understand that the left image may not be possible or achievable but rather unreachable perfection!

Okay, for real, I know you’re wanting to see how my hair looks naturally and straight, so here you go! *Side note – these pictures are obviously from different lengths and are heavily adjusted so that you can see the texture of my hair better.

I apologize for the close-up, lol.

For reference, I tend to manually straighten my hair to then re-curl it or create waves with my flat iron. The top left and bottom right images are as straight as they get for me. Notice the evident frizz on the bottom left picture (layers in your hair will create this, too).

You’re treating your hair as you would your hair type

This probably sounds confusing, so let me try to explain it better. When I straighten my curly hair, it’s about training my hair. I can’t just simply run a brush through it on Day 2 of no-wash and expect it to straighten, nor can I blow it dry wet with zero product in and expect it to be or stay immaculately straight. At least not for long.

I can’t treat my curly hair the same if I’m trying to make it straight. For the straight hair girlies, you can’t treat your hair the same as you would for your straight hair if you’re trying to achieve a curl.

That’s the TEA, which means it really is about the proper prep work and using the right product for the look you’re trying to achieve!

You are “prepping” your hair all wrong

For instance, to achieve my immaculate “curly hair days“, it requires lots and lots of product (like, no joke, heavy amounts, the curl cast, and even multiple products) and it needs moisture and hold in order to keep it tamed and frizz-free, which means I’m going without washing but every 2-3-4 days, depending. Yes, oil and itch central.

We all know hot water is any hair type’s enemy when it comes to drying out and frizz, but do I listen? Not always. So retaining moisture from washing my curly hair is crucial, regardless of my hair being more fine. My fine hair also forces me to wash more regularly than others because of oil build up, and I just can’t get through 3+ days with an oily, itchy scalp.

Regardless, for curly girls, we worship the moisture, except when we are looking to go sleek and straight. That doesn’t mean we don’t need it, but have you ever dealt with the time span of a ripe avocado? It’s like that when figuring out the right amount of moisture to go straight – just too much and you’ve ruined your chances basically.

Each hair type is entirely different. And with that: in order to achieve a look the complete opposite of your hair’s natural state, you must prep it entirely different as well.

For me to go from kinky curly to smooth straight requires 6 steps:

  1. Wash my hair (preferably with a scalp cleansing shampoo first then something smoothing). For me, I need a CLEAN SLATE scalp free of product, and I go *extra light* on conditioner!
  2. Apply STRAIGHTENING products to my clean, wet hair (everywhere except the roots, because you know, hello oil):
    1. something “Anti-frizz”
    2. a heat resistant
    3. and a “straight” or smoothing product
  3.  Blow-dry my hair (using an ion or boar’s bristle brush) in SMALL sections. I repeat, SMALL sections, not half my head at once.
  4. Go back through and use a ceramic plate flat iron in small sections. Again, SMALL sections.
  5. Set my hair with an anti-frizz oil or holding spray if I’m trying to make my hair my prisoner.

Here’s the thing: my hair failed to stay straight the very first time I attempted, and the second, and the third. But within weeks, months and over 20+ years later, with the testing of many products – my hair has now become “trained” with the capability of staying straight (except when it gets wet, of course). And at this point I may only straighten my hair once a month, max, while I also can use less and less product.

Now for someone with naturally straight, fine, or thick straight hair, who can’t seem to hold that curl – it’s because your hair’s natural state is not prepped or trained to hold a curl. Something I heard and learned over the years is this: dirty hair is the best hair to achieve desired results. While you may be thinking, “Are you crazy?“, as a matter of fact: day 2, after having prepped and straightened my curly hair, is my overall “Best Hair Day”. It’s when it’s most manageable – if that makes sense.

Hair “prep” for those struggling to hold a curl:

  • Wash less before styling (style on Day 2 natural, dirty hair)
  • When you wash, use a “voluminous” shampoo (mainly or only wash your roots)
  • Use less conditioner (or any “smoothing” products), this essentially “smooths” and weighs down the hair (and the curl, which prevents it from maintaining its shape).
  • Do not blow dry your hair with a brush, and use a lower heat setting (using heat and a brush to dry your hair retains the memory of your hair drying “straight”)
  • You need and must use a texturizing spray!
  • In addition, you may need some extra help – such as a curling wand, curlers, twistees that you sleep in overnight, braids, or any of those DIY techniques you can find online (such as hair plopping).

Hair “prep” for those struggling to keep it straight:

  • Cleanse your hair, primarily your SCALP (stripping it of the build-up of oils), repeat process multiple washes before styling if needed.
  • Use “smoothing” or fortifying shampoo (preferably sulfate-free/anti-frizz or something to protect from damage/weak ends).
  • Go light on conditioner, if not skip it (apply only on your ends, not your roots).
  • Apply straightening styling product on wet hair, avoiding roots (you want another smoothing product or oil, anti-frizz and don’t forget heat protectant). My go-to right now is BTZ Smooth Criminal.
  • Blow-dry hair first in small sections, then flat iron over in small sections (takes time, but it’s like a double-whammy).
  • Finish lightly with a holding spray (if you get super oily fast, you might need to use minimally or leave out completely)

Don’t pay the cheap price for damaged hair

It’s honestly tempting to only have to spend $20 on a blow dryer, curling iron, or flat iron – especially if you’re one who doesn’t “style” your mane that much in the first place, like myself. I go all-natural almost too much to save my own life, and by all-natural – mainly just thrown up into a messy bun.

And you’ve been told repeatedly, yet ignored, that your hot tools matter. It isn’t the price that gets you – it’s the heat, the plates, and the air flow you pay for. If you’ve got none of that going for your hair, you can’t sit here and wonder “Why nothing’s working” or “I’ve tried everything“.

FYI: no hair type will curl or straighten properly with dead or split ends. You will have to get it cut, and given some R&R before you can have any desired effect again.

Believe me when I say that I’ve tested the tried-and-true products you see all over the internet and even Tiktok now. Not everything worked or gave me the results they gave or promised others. That’s the reality, and you have to find what actually works for your hair.

My hair rebels and flops if I try anything that involves a brush and dryer combo. It turns into a frizz bomb. To get my desired results, I MUST use a flat iron, or the WavyTalk thermal flat iron brush once I have blown dry my hair.

Now, I’m not saying drop 3-hundo on the Dyson Supersonic Hairdryer (although, I’d kill to have it because I’ve heard it does wonders). But brands like CHI and BabyLiss are a good place to start in the appropriate price range. I’ve gone through several products throughout the years, and some are even my repeated products I continue to use and have lasted me forever.

Hairdryers

Blow Dry Brush

Flat Irons

Flat Iron Combs (you read me right)

Don’t know what I’m talking about? Use a fine-tooth comb on a section of hair to separate the strands as you work your way down root to ends, following behind with your flat iron. It gets every strand of your hair straight, smooth, detangled, and shined – without adding the oils of your hands.

Just trust me on this.

Curling Irons

The right products are the key ingredients

So while prepping your hair is half the work, using the right products is the other half. And you should always apply product to wet hair. The only time product should ever go on dry hair is when you’re using a finishing oil or holding spray. But sometimes even those products can cause your hair to revert back to its natural state, so beware.

Manipulated straight hair needs to stay dry and refrain from excess moisture, and curly hair needs volume, grit (meaning not smooth), and just the right amount of moisture without weighing it down!

It would be senseless for me to use products for straightening my hair that are meant for my naturally curly hair, right? Common sense, I think. The same goes for those with thick or fine straight hair who want to go curly – don’t use any product with “smoothing” or “silkening” results.

Psst, hey straight-haired girls who want curls! You go to the beach, right? You know what beach hair looks and feels like after you’ve been in the ocean or from seaspray? Kinda rough, sticky, coarse-like feeling? That’s the base you want.

Naturally straight/wavy hair needs “volume” and “texture” in order to adhere to the curl shape  – yes, even if you have thick straight hair. Volume “lifts” your hair at the root, making it stronger, more manageable to style, and maximizing “fuller” results without curls falling flat or limp. So, don’t be afraid of volume!

And naturally curly hair needs a double dose of straightening training – so, blow-dry wet (using one of the hair drying brushes mentioned above) and then heat styling with a flat iron. I’m not a fan of adding product to my straightened hair once it’s dry and flat ironed, except for the occasional “hair spray” at the very end. Doing so just adds extra oils to your strands, weighs the hair down faster and it poses the chance of reverting your hair back to its curly state.

Again, straight hair needs to stay dry and away from excessive moisture!

Biggest tip for the best straightening results? Humidity blocker, Anti-frizz, and heat resistant products (leave-in products AND shampoo) – 100%. Even if you don’t live anywhere in humid climates – mist, steam, and sprinkles will get’cha.

Products for “keeping it straight”

**I don’t guarantee these to work on every single individual, you will have to do the work in figuring out what works for your hair (it’s about the ingredients) – this requires investing some $$.

Products for“holding that curl”

**I don’t guarantee these to work on every single individual, you will have to do the work in figuring out what works for your hair (it’s about the ingredients) – this requires investing some $$.

Honest “tips” to remember when curling straight hair:

  • The idea in curling straight hair is not to miraculously hope your hair “curls” or curls more naturally, but rather to prep it in allowing the ability to take on a “curl shape” through the use of heat, then holding that curl shape temporarily.
  • The smaller the sections (when curling), the better.
  • Apply product to WET hair only; except for a finishing hair spray.
  • When applying the product to thick straight hair, section hair in half or fours and work in a small amount of product in each section for even distribution. Then comb through.
  • Apply finishing spray to each strand before curling (sets and holds the curl).
  • Pin up your curls after each section using bobby pins or gator clips, allowing the curl to “cool down” and hold more shape and volume before setting it with a spray at the very end.
  • A little product goes a long way – too much product only weighs the hair down, and when the hair is weighed down it is less likely to curl or hold its shape.
  • Texturizing spray is a must for straight or wavy hair to take on a curl shape – it is like using sandpaper on a flat, smooth surface in order for paint to hold and stick.
  • Get better results on Day 2 dirty hair (after correct prepping for curling your hair).
  • Curls are likely to fall flat due to 7 probabilities: 1. Humidity (not just from weather or the outside), 2. Continually touching your hair, 3. Too much product, or too little, 4. Not enough hold in the product, 5. Not enough heat to create the shape, 6. Your hair is too damaged or frail (split ends, unhealthy-dry, breakage) or 7. Your hair was not “dirty” upon styling. Keep at figuring out which is likely the problem!

Honest “tips” to remember when straightening curly hair:

  • The idea in straightening curly hair is not to miraculously hope your hair “straightens” or is more naturally straight, but rather to prep it in allowing the ability to take on the “smoothness” through the use of heat, then holding that straight, smooth shape.
  • The smaller the sections (when flat ironing and blow drying), the better.
  • Apply product to WET hair only; except for a finishing hair spray.
  • Blow dry hair completely BEFORE using the flat iron.
  • The right blow drying brush can solve all of your smooth, shine and frizz problems.
  • When applying the product to thick curly hair, section hair in half or fours and work in a small amount of product in each section for even distribution. Then comb through.
  • Washing your hair prior to blow drying is key – the hair needs to be completely cleansed of any excessive moisture and oils at the root – otherwise hair will frizz, fall flat, or regress back to its natural state and retain less of a smooth, straight shape.
  • When using your flat iron, do not use the highest heat setting, especially at your ends; you want to focus on getting that heat at your roots without risking burning your scalp. Bottomline is, get your roots REAL GOOD.
  • Straight hair is likely to revert or fall flat due to 7 probabilities: 1. Humidity (not just from weather or outside), 2. Continually touching your hair, 3. Too much product, or too little, 4. Not enough hold in the product, 5. Not enough heat to create a smooth shape, 6. Your hair is too damaged or frail (split ends, unhealthy-dry, breakage) or 7. Your hair was too “dirty” upon styling.

[Read on to Learn 3 different curl style tutorials using your flat iron, a piece of tin foil and a curling iron]

4 Reasons why your hair won't stay straight or curl | #hairtips #stylingtips | Why your hair won't stay straight or hold a curl | The products to use for curly and straight hair | How to properly prep your hair for the style you desire | How to curl straight hair and how to straighten curly hair | #beautyhacks | theMRSingLink
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