Everyone has priorities – some more than others – such as work, school, family, friends and hobbies. Relationships usually fall somewhere in that category – at least, they should – but there are times where many simply have no room in their life for a relationship. There are also those who simply lack the effort in making their relationship a priority.
Granted, we may not expect to be at the top (maybe not all the time), but the core stem of happiness within our relationships is to feel important and wanted. The last thing we want is to be placed on the back burner in someone’s life. Sure, our priorities in life are timely and situational, and vary from every individual’s circumstances. The key is finding someone who understands the importance of balancing their life priorities and how to prioritize their relationship.
10 Real Clues You Are A Priority In His Life
he never leaves you with doubt or uncertainty
You will never have to question his integrity or character – in how he treats you and the relationship as a whole. He will show you your deserving and worthiness as not only a woman but also as a woman he is worthy of.
His sense of courtesy and consideration, especially for your life aspirations, personal goals, values, and feelings, is also a major sign of his devotion to having your best interest at heart. So you will never have to wonder if he’s only in it for the now or for the long haul.
If you are a priority in his life, you won’t be in a constant limbo of, “Does he love me [for ME], or does he not?“
he shows up (promptly)
Literally and figuratively. He shows up in the relationship – he’s dependable, stable, consistent, and unfailing. Ok, realistically he’s not going to be perfect at all the things. But he can manage his imperfections and struggle while doing his part with grace. Meaning, he isn’t disappearing into thin air, making excuses, flipping the tables, manipulating or gaslighting every situation that becomes an inconvenience to him. He owns up to his wrongdoings with the motive to make things right – not just with a “sorry“, but also changed behavior.
He takes pride in the relationship – knowing that walking away without fighting for it introspectively is only taking the easy way out.
He also shows up on time – you know, like for a date. He doesn’t flake on dinner with your parents time and time again or make excuses for missing or breaking plans with you. When you’re a priority, he honors his word with action.
he actually makes and sets aside time for you
Sprinkle in sacrifices from time to time and that, my friends, is one decent human being. Life consists of choices and sacrifices every single day. If he goes out of his way to see you (meaning, he simply PENCILS you into his schedule regardless of what he has or doesn’t have going on), then that is a man who is sure of his feelings for you.
Hell, if he reschedules his daily gym sesh in order to have lunch with you – he gets it.
He isn’t waiting last minute to call you on a Friday night whim (after finding out guys night is a no-go) and he sure as hell isn’t riding out the week in case something better comes along that weekend. He is thinking [of you] in advance, by making time – even if it’s whatever little time he *does* have.
when the going gets tough, he doesn’t just dip
Because the man who makes you a priority isn’t going to run away from relationship turmoil or disharmony. He won’t disappear without a trace at the sign of sudden distress, tension, or havoc. That’s toxic childs play to be left behind at the schoolyard.
Instead, he views the dips and valleys you will face as a catalyst for relationship growth, and will treat it as such. He will rationalize the imperfections and times of hardship a relationship will endure and face them with you, not leave you in the dust or turn them against you.
you’re not just in his life for “a good time”
You’re not a temp or a one-and-done deal – he makes that perfectly clear from the very beginning and honors it. When you’re with him, it isn’t solely about getting lavishly drunk and ending the night in bed. There is no late-night “I miss you, I want you” calls or texts because when a man makes you a priority he will want to showcase more than just fulfilling sexual temptations.
When you’re together, you’re not just the gal he invites out in group settings – he desires one-on-one quality time with you, and just you. He also isn’t stringing you along as his carpool after a drunk night out, nor are you the lady-friend he downplays to his crew (that you have yet to meet).
his doors are shut and locked
Meaning, his options. He isn’t stealthily leaving his doors and windows open for any given opportunity, or in case something better strikes his fancy. This confirmation will be verbal (ie. defining the relationship), while his actions also follow suit. Big or small, he won’t leave you with suspicions of sparing his time with someone else.
It’s rather simple: if you are a priority in his life, he isn’t going to go dark on a weekend that you both decide to ride solo. The extra effort will be made and reciprocated in-between times that you’re together –Â period.
[Related Read: What It Means If You Do Not Define Your Relationship]
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he actually cares about your needs, dreams and desires
And he wants to be a part of them, as he also wants you to be a part of his. Meaning, he takes you into consideration when it comes to his life choices and decisions – big or small. He isn’t just going to up and move for that new job states away without consulting your thoughts first. Because if you’re a priority in his life, continuing to make you a part of his life is still a goal on his life aspirations, too.
He’s also supportive and truly cares about you and your needs, wants, and dreams – in more ways than one. He is present in fulfilling your wants and needs – hell, even your overall safety and well-being! When you play an important role in his life, he will stand by your side as you start your own business, work through financial issues, battle personal health issues, or finish grad school.
It’s simple:Â he also won’t drag you down your pedestal of self-love, he’s applauding, supporting, and encouraging of it.
his trustworthiness is practically laid out for you
He has nothing to hide – he actually wants your undivided trust, so this is something he knows he must continue to earn proactively. He knows that your trust is something that can be ripped away in seconds, yet take years to build back, which is why he greatly values honesty (even when you don’t necessarily want or like what you hear). The man who makes you a priority lays all cards out on the table – that integrity and honesty come with transparency and mutual respect, not secrecy.
[Related Read: 4 Ways To Be More Transparent In Your Relationship]
you won’t have to beg him for attention
When you are a priority, it’s pretty obvious he is yours and you are his. He will even go out of his way to show you that. You won’t ever feel like you need validation of his feelings for you, or to fight for his attention. As fairly “normal” and healthy jealousy is thought to be, the last thing he wants to portray is that something or someone else has even the slightest chance of coming between you and him. You will know confidently that he only has eyes and ears for you, and his drive is to make you wanted and desired above all.
he’s actually interested in what you say and feel
In regular conversation, moments of concern, time of need, and in tense moments of conflict. He is not only supportive but attentive and empathetic, even if he doesn’t always agree with you. When you are a priority in his life, he actually wants to listen to what you have to say, but more importantly, he values your experience through your lens.
He will remember not only the big things but the little things. Hint hint hint – you won’t have to remind him it’s your birthday week or the anniversary of your first date. If anything, he’ll be reminding you.